Right now, the only thing that's keeping me from quitting any and all forms of Buddhist activity (besides chanting alone in front of my Gohonzon) is this piece of guidance:
It is only natural to feel that our efforts have been worthwhile and be motivated to work harder when we are recognized and praised by those around us. Part of a leader’s responsibility is to acknowledge, commend, and encourage those who are making dedicated, earnest efforts. However, even if we are not praised or properly appreciated, it is important that we don’t end up resenting leaders and other members, or lose our enthusiasm. That only erases our benefit and good fortune and causes us to stop growing. Buddhist practice is a struggle with the devilish functions within one’s own life. Those devilish functions will use every possible means to sap the enthusiasm and destroy the faith of a person striving sincerely in their Buddhist practice. There may even be times when a person wonders why they keep running into such hardships. But nothing goes unseen by the Gohonzon. In light of the law of cause and effect, the more effort one makes for the Mystic Law, the more good fortune one will accumulate in one’s life. (From the Banner of the Law by Daisaku Ikeda)
I'm trying to chant just to find joy when all I want to do is to cry. Recently, I achieved amazing victories in different areas of my life. I should have expected the demons to attack me in the context of my Buddhist practice, but truth is, it never crossed my mind. I've always felt my Buddhist family as one that was judgement-free, drama-free, and where I could actually be myself without fear of being misunderstood. My mother and my district leader both said to chant to find joy. I'll just do that I guess. And read that guidance. I'll come back soon with some stuff I've been thinking of writing for a while.
Hello wonderful people who read my blog! I am so sorry I have not be able to write recently. I have been really busy and happily engaged in one thing and the other. It is incredible how rich my life has become and I am so grateful. I don't want the blog to wither and die just because I have no inspiration to write at the moment, so I thought I would share this lovely video I have found on the YouTube. It explains the basic daily practice of Daimoku and Gongyo and gives some basic information on the theory of Buddhism as well.
Enjoy! Oh, please, do comment here or anywhere else if you have questions or requests for posts. I am always thrilled when I receive requests as it pushes me into action!
Finally, my bellydance video is ready! The background for this wonderful experience can be found in these two posts: Dancing experience in-the-making Dancing experience part two. AKA the One Evil Now, onto the technical aspects. The day I stood up and made my rather crazy determination, I actually had no idea how to put it into practice. I mean, of course I had to keep on dancing and learn the choreography, I knew I needed a costume, but I also needed someone to shoot it and a place.
I don't normally do this, but I really wanted to share this wonderful piece of guidance. It's from "Humanistic Education", a section of The New Human Revolution v24. I am studying this section both with the Education Division and as part of my Leader's training. A friend of mine read it at a Youth Division meeting and around the time I posted my last entry I started messaging my friends to know where it came from. Every friend told me to ask another, until I almost gave up. Then, since I have encountered an obstacle at work that I have decided to face head on (with great results I have to say), and I have finished the Dedicated study programme for the first year (oddly enough, I don't feel like reading other Buddhist stuff if I know I have my DL study programme to go through), I decided to dedicate the time running up to graduation reading this booklet I got when I joined the Education Division. And here it was, the guidance I was looking for!
I wanted to speak a bit more of the experience I am doing with bellydancing. In my last post, I mentioned my current battle against my one evil. In my case, my one evil is my lack of self esteem, which makes me dependent from other people’s approval. My journey to finding and transforming my one evil has been long and complicated. I went through several experiences in my life. Transforming my financial karma was one step in my journey. It was my second absolute victory and the first time I felt I had really accomplished the impossible. Sometimes, I make myself go back at my recent past, a time when having a coffee with friends meant completely reworking my weekly budget, and buying clothes in anything but a charity shop was out of the question. I don’t want to forget that time, I MUST not forget that time, I have to cling to every struggle, to every time when I felt impotent and hopeless. Not to delve in past misery, nor to gloat. I need to remember the pain in order to be able to really empathise with the people in my district and chapter who are going through similar problems at the moment, so that I can feel true compassion and find the right words to encourage them.
